Some days I don't feel like writing this

There are some days when I just feel down. I know I always come across as happy and upbeat so today I will share with you what stinks! The things that really get to me. Maybe I am writing this since we have an appointment with the developmental ped today and I always dread those appointments. So here's my list:
It stinks when people look at us funny when we are in public! Seriously one can tell Janelle is disabled why stare at me like I have this out of control child who talks loudly and screams indoors!
It stinks that I watch my child go through so much and struggle daily.
It really stinks that I have more medical knowledge than most first year med students! Okay this may not be all that bad.
It stinks that my older children can recite a list of their sisters medical problems because I taught them in case of emergencies!
Okay that's a shortened list. To be honest my list of things I adore is longer, but on days like today it's harder to see those things. Like a dark cloud has blocked them from view. It's on these days when I want to go hide, but I can't Nellie needs me. Right now she is still sleep and I went in and gazed at her peaceful face. When she's asleep you'd never know there was a thing wrong with her and I like to think when she's asleep in her dreams she can do all the things everyone else can. That she is in a happy little world where she don't need doctors, tests, therapies. You know I think I'm gonna end this early today and go join her for some cuddle time :)