An open letter to Nickelodeon and Disney

To whom it may concern:

Thank you so much for your programming (Even if I swear it has subliminal messages to children). It is because of you I get my little bit of sanity during the day, but also because of you I am driven insane on a daily bases with your montages of songs which are sang out of tune by five children daily.
Yes Phinias and Ferb have become a staple in our home, almost at one time overtaking Sponge bob. I have to wonder who would win in a cage match Gary or Perry. Gary is slow, but then again he is the quiet type and everyone knows you have to watch the quit ones. I also am curious how exactly a pineapple ended up under the sea and why a sponge would want to live in one. Oh the things that boggle a parents mind.
Back to the point of this letter. It is during your programming when I can sit back and not wonder what Nellie is going to dump on my floor. I do have one request please do away with commercials. It is during the ads Nellie turns wearing her wide smile and I have to watch carefully to see what her mind is thinking of. Usually this is the point I have to duck to avoid a flying toy, or grab a bottle of Pepsi just before it becomes a puddle in the middle of my living room rug. Yes, even bathroom breaks are avoided at all costs during your shows, which can at times lead to another mess for me to clean.
Mine is a simple request please get rid of the ads or simply have all ads starring your addictive characters. Perhaps at the very least you can add a subliminal message that says use the bathroom, toys aren't for throwing, please don't ruin the rug. With that stated I plan to send you a six hour video of my children singing all your catchy tunes, ENJOY!!!!

Sincerely,
A very very tired Mama